Pen Friends
Pen Friends
I fell in love with my pen pal immediately and it hasn’t ended. Spiritually, it hasn’t. Chris was my best friend for all times. She was always there whenever I needed a friend. Do you have a friend like that? I’m talking 24/7 and not a teddy bear or a doll.
When I was approximately 11-12 years old, I read an ad in a magazine for a penfriend. She lived in England! My heart jumped to my throat. A friend in a foreign country? Wow! I brought the magazine to my parents and asked permission to write to this stranger who lived overseas. One of the first things that my dad suggested was to look up her address. I went to the school library and located the Isle of Wight. It was below the mainland, south of Portsmouth. It sounded like a lifelong adventure. Dad was pleased as punch and Mom didn’t really care one way or the other. I’m sure that Mom thought that it would peter out with time and that she wouldn’t have to worry about me ever visiting her and getting lost and ending up in a different foreign land!
Dad brought me to the post office to purchase airmail stationery and envelopes. The writing tablet was so thin that you could see through it. I learned after the first letter, that I needed a sheet of paper beneath it so that the writing didn’t wave here and there, up and down. It also needs to be said, that it was possible to purchase a lone sheet that folded into the envelope. Dad paid for the expense of letter writing including the postage up until I became about seventeen and working. He did enjoy reading some of her letters. I didn’t let him or mom read much because they were private.
Private is the key word here. Chris and I told each other secrets like you wouldn’t believe and it wasn’t just about boys. We talked about friends. We poured our hearts out to each other and gave advice. We explained all situations and circumstances. This included, should I have danced with him? Was he a good kisser? What clothes did you wear? You should’ve worn a different colored dress.
What did your mum say?
Of course we had differences with the language. Mum? The boot? Dustbin? Loo? Way In-Way Out. It did get a little confusing at the time.
Chris and her husband came for a visit in 1981. There was still snow on the ground. We lived up north at the time, and we brought them to see the headwaters of the Mississippi River. Later, I brought them to Minneapolis to meet my parents and two brothers. Along the way, we stopped in St. Cloud and went into the hospital to visit my mother-in-law. I learned the differences and similarities were between a British hospital and American. My brother was an airport policeman, and gun control was a topic of conversation.
I visited for the first time in 1984. I saw how different the two countries are and learned about how they live and grew to enjoy the differences and similarities. I had a chance to meet her family. Her parents were so kind. The roses huge and so wonderful to smell. Chris brought me around the island while her husband cared for the children one day. It was more than I could’ve hoped for. We stopped for tea and sconce. Absolutely delicious. It took another couple years and then my husband joined me. We had a delightful time.
It took me twenty years before I went again to visit. We’d both changed in looks, but she was still my bestfriend. We spoke of growing and we toured the island once again. She brought me to Carisbrooke Castle and we had a marvelous time. We drove around the island, and I’d say, ‘let’s eat here’, so we did. We laughed and laughed. We shopped in the old section of thatched roofs and pub signs.
Three years later in 2015, I visited once again. Chris talked me into staying three weeks because she wanted to travel. She made the arrangements. We chose a few days in Baths and then we went to Stratford Upon Avon. Unfortunately, for me, she didn’t drive and it was hard doing so much walking and I didn’t care for all the bus and train rides. That’s my only complaint. We had a marvelous time.
I asked her once, ‘why did you decide to respond to my letter?’ and she said, ‘because you had a sense of humor.’ We laughed about that, too.
However, while I was there, Chris seemed to clear her throat more than usual. I asked about it, but she wasn’t concerned. We began discussing our next adventure.
Chris passed away in January of 2019 from throat cancer. I dearly loved her. She opened the world to me and she’ll always be in my heart.
We’d been writing for fifty-five years. It began with letters, developed into email, then Facebook, but we reverted back to letters once again. We filled both sides of five-six pages. We wrote about once a month, through thick and thin even when there wasn’t much to say. I really loved her and miss her something fierce. She always commented and liked everything I put on Facebook. She had my back.
Do you have pen pal? Have you ever? Are you in contact with each other? Reach out, and maybe they’re on Facebook. It’s worth the try. Here we are when we're saying goodby for the last time. Chris has a hard time smiling and I can't.
Barb
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